Something about video games.

Sometimes a hiatus is required when you go gallivanting around Japan.

What? Yeah I was in Japan what of it?

I don't really speak or read Japanese so it was sort of difficult for me to get around and it turned out I flew into the wrong city altogether. I wanted to rent a GT-R and replicate what Top Gear did a couple series' back but apparently those credit cards you get in the mail don't work in Japan. I figured any establishment worth their salt would recognize the clout of having credit with the Platinum First Premier Bank and fall atop themselves to serve my every whim, but it was not to be. So in order to get to Kazunori Yamauchi at his Batcave in Polyphony Digital I ended up having to walk the entire way from Miyakojima to Tokyo. It is quite a hike, let me assure you.



After I straightened out my financial situation I promptly bought several hundred flavours of Kit Kat and a translator. My mission was clear: Seek out the head of Sony's biggest racing producer and ask him what the fuck was taking so long with Gran Turismo 5.

Interview with a vampire Kazunori Yamauchi

Snakes and Sparklers: Gran Turismo 5 has been a long time coming for everyone involved: you, your company Polyphony Digital, Sony, fans, Sony's shareholders and even your dear old mum. What importance does this iteration have as compared to previous installments in the series?

Kazunori Yamauchi: It is the most important thing we have done to date; it is life to me (laughs). All of the experience we have accumulated over the years culminates in this and I'd like [Gran Turismo 5] to represent everything we've learned up to now.

SnS: Was Gran Turismo on the PSP a major goal for you or was it an obligation to Sony to branch out?

Yamauchi: I had been wanting to do a portable Gran Turismo since the PSP was released but other projects put [GT PSP] on hiatus. With the upcoming release of Gran Turismo 5 it was now or never (laughs). It was never only an obligation to Sony, it is a project I've been wanting to pursue from the beginning.

SnS: After hinting so much at a 2009 release date for so long and announcing a 'major advancement' before Tokyo Game Show 2009, the March 2010 [Japanese-market] release date for Gran Turismo 5 came as a shock to some fans. Was this the only announcement you had on hand for TGS?

Yamauchi: (laughs) We actually had several things to announce about Gran Turismo 5 at the show but when I got the chance to try Forza Motorsport 3 at the show I became quite nervous about the state of my game and asked Sony for a six-month extension to the development time, which they graciously entertained.



SnS: This begs the question: What the fuck's been taking so long? (Okay I didn't word it like that but it's what I was thinking!)

Yamauchi: Well, I was taking a cue from George Broussard and pretty much just spending investor money on doing stuff I loved, like eating endangered animals and driving a submarine and then occasionally releasing a screen shot or other news that I was really working on the game so I could get some more investment money, but when 3DRealms went bankrupt I became scared and decided to actually seriously work on the game.

After a series of expletives were thrown from my mouth to Kazunori's face I was unceremoniously kicked to the curb for being disrespectful, and they took my recorded interview, too. It's a great thing I've got such an excellent memory for me to transcribe the entire thing here for you today.

Unfortunately I don't have much to show for my Japan trip because I couldn't find a way to bring all 4,358 Haruhi statues I bought in Akihabara back on the plane with me.